Hotep (Peace) Brothers & Sisters,
My (birth) name is Ray Hagins. My spiritual
name is Sa Ra Ankh Hotep
Maakheru Setep En Ra (which means "a son of God, who has been
chosen by God to be a teacher of truth bringing (or giving) life and
peace)." I presently serve as the Chief Elder and Pastor of The
Afrikan Village (formerly New Ephesus Missionary Baptist) Church in
St. Louis, Missouri.
Many people have asked me about how I made
the transition from a
Pentecostal minister (who was "sold out" for the so-called
gospel of Jesus
Christ) to Afrikan conscious minister and warrior for the liberation
of
Black Afrikan people. After sharing my testimony with another minister,
he
suggested that I post the testimony of my transition into Afrikan
consciousness on the Internet in hopes of inspiring other brothers
and
sisters who may be at the point of coming into an Afrikan awareness
from the quantum deception of European philosophical and religious
thought. I pray that my testimony will help to strengthen and inspire
others who are at the crossroad of right knowledge.
In 1987 I was invited to a meeting of about
25 Black men (educators,
businessmen, community leaders, and 3 ministers) in my hometown of
Paterson, New Jersey. Although the meeting had not started, we were
informally talking about what needed to be done to enhance our community.
Suddenly, I overheard one of the brothers say, "We need to get
this European Jesus out of the minds of our people, and realize that
the original Christ was named Horus."
I couldn't believe what I had just heard! Immediately,
everything in
me shut down and I went into "battle station" mode. I mean,
I IMMEDIATELY went to "Def-Con 1" ("Def-Con" is
a military phrase, which means "Defense Condition." Def-Con
5 is peacetime, Def-Con 4 is combat preparedness, Def-Con 3 is combat
readiness, Def-Con 2 is at combat station, and Def-Con 1 means, "engage
the enemy").
I stepped over to this brother and said, "What
do you mean Jesus' name
was Horace?" (I thought he was saying H-O-R-A-C-E.) He responded,
"It WAS Horus. The first virgin-born, Christ-child was Horus
of Egypt and the first record of his birth dates back to over 6,000
years B.C."
Well, I, (with my sincere, but ignorant self),
stood in the middle of
the floor and said, "Brothers, I am sorry to have to leave, but
ANYBODY who refuses to accept who Jesus is a deceiver and is of the
devil. I rebuke you in the name of Jesus and I plead the blood of
Jesus in this place." (NOTE: I said this because I honestly felt
that I was in the midst of satanic agents.) Now, understand, these
were Black men who were aware of the truth of our Afrikan history,
and I saw my own (Black) brothers as agents of satan!!! Now, did Euro-Gentile
Cultural Imperialism and Supremacy (via my "Christian" training)
do a job on me or what?
I left that meeting and actually
declared war on these men. I misused
my radio show (and later my TV show) to blast these men. I felt that
it was
my "sacred duty" to defend the gospel of Jesus Christ and
warn as many
people as I could about these Black men (who I genuinely mis-perceived
as) agents of the devil. I did this for well over a year.
The 3rd Sunday in March of 1991,
as I stood up to preach at my church
in Paterson, NJ, just as I was about to read the text for the message,
which was Romans 8:28, it seemed as though someone whispered in my
right ear, "Did people know God BEFORE Moses went up on the mountain?"
I actually turned around to see who was there
because it was just that
audible and clear. I told the congregation, "Y'all.wait a minute!
This
question just popped into my head (then I told them what it was).
It wasn't
that significant for them, but it was VERY significant for me because
ALL of my theology was based in Moses coming down off the mountain
with the "Ten Commandments" (or "The Law"). I
will never forget that day because it was the day that I began to
THINK! I actually exercised my critical thinking faculties and scrutinized
what I had been taught all my life.
I asked myself, "Did Moses have a God-consciousness
BEFORE talking
with God on the mountain?"
A few days later, during my devotions, I stumbled
across Acts 7:20-22,
which states: "In which time Moses was born, and was exceeding
fair, and
nourished up in his father's house three months: And when he was cast
out, Pharaoh's daughter took him up, and nourished him for her own
son. And Moses was learned in ALL THE WISDOM OF THE EGYPTIANS, and
was mighty in words and in deeds."
I looked up the word "wisdom" (as
it was used in that particular
verse); it comes from the Greek word "sophia," which means,
"skill and
discretion in imparting the truth of God; the knowledge and practice
of the
requisites for godly and upright living; supreme intelligence, such
as
belongs to God; the wisdom of God as evidenced in forming and executing
counsels in the formation and government of the world and the scriptures."
I said, WAIT A MINUTE!!! Moses got THIS from the Egyptians!!!
(NOTE: Throughout my theological training I
was taught that the
Egyptians were barbaric, ignorant, enemies of and cursed by God).
Several days later, as I was coming from a
meeting in downtown
Paterson, my car was parked in front of an old book store that sold
used
books called Bazaar Books. I had passed this store hundreds of times
over the years and NEVER had the slightest inclination to go inside;
but this particular day I was "moved" to go inside and browse
around. Of course, the only area that really interested me was Religion
& Philosophy.
I picked up a book entitled, "Osiris &
The Egyptian Resurrection"
(Part 1) by E.A. Wallis Budge. The idea of an Egyptian "RESURRECTION"
caught my attention. I opened the front cover to the preface and came
across the following words:
"The central figure of the ancient Egyptian
Religion was Osiris, and
the chief fundamentals of his cult were the BELIEF IN HIS DIVINITY,
DEATH, RESURRECTION, and absolute control of the destinies of the
bodies and souls of men. The central point of each Osirian's Religion
was his HOPE OF RESURRECTION IN A TRANSFORMED BODY AND OF IMMORTALITY,
WHICH COULD ONLY BE REALIZED BY HIM THROUGH THE DEATH AND RESURRECTION
OF OSIRIS.
I literally shouted out, "WHAT IS THIS?"
I immediately suffered what
we psychologists call "cognitive dissonance." I knew that
this was EXACTLY what I had believed since I was a child and preached
for almost 20 years, but the central figure of MY belief and message
was a man called "Jesus Christ." What really bothered me
was, according to what I had been taught, Jesus Christ was the ONLY
person about whom such a message applied. Then when I read that this
belief system had been with the Nile Valley Afrikans for at least
the last 15 to 20 thousand years.I really lost it!!! You see, any
scholar of Christianity will tell you that Genesis 1:1 only dates
back to 4,004 B.C.
Then, to top it off, I read about the Ancient
Afrikan TRINITY; which
consisted of Ausar, Aset, and Heru (which the Europeans renamed: Osiris,
Isis and HORUS)!!! I came to find out that Horus was the "virgin
born, immaculately conceived" son of Osiris. This led me on a
sincere and intense search for actual undeniable evidence for the
truth.
The more I researched, the more I realized
that the entire program
that I had been indoctrinated into was a LIE. In 1993, I decided to
leave
the ministry that I was so popular in and knew so well. I simply could
not,
any longer, stand in front of my people and teach that which I had
found to be a stolen, copied, plagiarized and European fabricated
version of the
ancient concepts of Afrikan spirituality.
This was the most painful period of my life.
At one point I had
become so depressed about my believing in LIES that I even had thoughts
of suicide. How could I have been so wrong??? I couldn't understand
how I actually experienced "the power of God" moving upon
me in mighty and awesome ways in the past IF this was all a lie???
I felt betrayed, humiliated, deceived, confused, unworthy, and like
a complete failure.
Now, I wasn't feeling all this because of the
truths that I had come
to find out about. No! For these truths were UNDENIABLE EVIDENCES
that DEMANDED AN UNDENIABLE and INEVITABLE VERDICT! That verdict was
that I had been lied to! I was angry with all those who taught me
these lies (my parents, my teachers, my professors, etc.). The ONLY
thing that helped me in this area was coming to the realization that
the same dog that bit me, bit my parents too! They were only teaching
me what they had been taught.
This, however, that doesn't apply to my seminary
professors. I met
with my the president of the seminary I graduated from, and asked
him, "Why isn't this information a part of the curriculum and
course requirements for a degree in Sacred Literature?" He said
to me, "You don't need to know about that. Besides, it is not
substantial data within the context of the mission statement of this
institution." He had just told me, in a politically correct way,
that I had been trained in one of the biggest LIES
of all time and that I was supposed to perpetuate this LIE and train
others
in it.
After several years of securing the proper
education of right
knowledge, I efficaciously returned to the pulpit in February of 1998,
when
I became the pastor of Ephesus Missionary Baptist Church in St. Louis
(which is another discourse all by itself). Through an old wise man,
God convicted me in September of 1997 by asking me; "Son, if
you young folk, whose eyes have been opened to the truth, abandon
our people (who don't know no better), then what hope is there for
us?" Then he said, "God DID call you to preach, but to preach
the TRUTH!"
Hence, here I am.
My reason for sharing this testimony
is NOT to "convert" anyone to African consciousness.but
simply to let you know that since the European
invasion and theft of our people from our Motherland, we Afrikans
have been born and raised in the LIE of European Religious and Cultural
Imperialism and we think we are walking in the truth (because it is
all that we know)! The religion that we have been made to love (Christianity),
was forced upon us by European slave traders and the European "slave
masters" who enslaved us. That alone should make EVERY Black
man, woman and child be suspect about the slave master's religion.
There is a phrase that says you reap what you
sow. Well, that
certainly is true, because I have gone (and am going) through the
same kind of attack that I viciously put on those brothers who compassionately
respected my ignorance in 1987. I wish that I could go back and tell
them
that I am so sorry for attacking their awareness with my ignorance.but
most of them have passed on. So when I give the oath to the Ancestors,
I
remember them. They were the ones that God used to plant the seed
of this truth in me. Now, when I am attacked (by others who are sincerely
ignorant), I see my "old" self and where I came from. That
helps me to be
compassionate on my attackers. I realize that they are sincerely defending
what they think is the truth (just like I did).
Coming into a consciousness of your Afrikan
self can (and probably
will be) very painful for you. I must admit that it's very painful
being
called "an antichrist" or "a messenger of satan"
or "false prophet," etc.,
by your own people. It hurts being MISUNDERSTOOD by your family, friends
and loved ones, especially when they haven't done (nor are they willing
to do) the research and/or learn what you have learned; but, yet you
are the one who is "deceived" and don't know what you are
talking about. Believe me, THAT HURTS!
Then there are those (Christians) who feel
that I "need to be stopped
for the sake of the gospel!" But I know that God has called me
and given me this assignment. AND I CAN'T STOP! Even if it means loved
ones walking away from me and calling me "crazy" (which
has happened), or even losing my physical life. And, it's just THAT
serious. The worse pain of all is when your family, friends, loved
ones, and others who would misjudge you, REFUSE to do their own research
to see for themselves the basis of your information or if what you
are saying is true or not.
I have actually pulled books from the libraries
of other ministers,
turned to the proof or source of the information in question and said,
"Here, man. See for yourself." They would look away and
say, "I don't want to see that." I have stood across the
desks of several friends (who are pastors) and asked them, "Brother,
why are you attacking me when what I have said is right here in the
very commentary that you study by and use to prepare your messages?"
I understand that the reason they didn't want to "see" was
because then they, too, would be compelled to change, and that is
definitely NOT an option for most ministers who can be voted out and/or
removed from their pulpits if they do not preach and uphold the "doctrines"
of that particular church or denomination.
Another problem that I was faced with was the
problem with my music
ministry. Over 90% of the songs that I wrote and used to sing, I couldn't
sing them anymore. I began to realize that it's not really about
worshipping GOD! It's about worshipping "Jesus!" Even the
biblical text
states that Jesus said that NO ONE IS TO BE WORSHIPPED BUT GOD ALONE!!!
("Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and HIM ONLY shalt thou
serve") (See Matthew 4:10 and Luke 4:8).
Did you know that (according to the biblical
text) Jesus NEVER told
his disciples to go preach (or teach) about him! He told his disciples,
"As
you go, preach, saying, The Kingdom of heaven is at hand" (Matthew
10:7). We have been programmed to give more attention to the so-called
"gift" (Jesus) than the giver (God) of the gift. Not only
could I not "preach" this Euro-Gentile "program"
anymore...I couldn't sing about it either. Being
that I was a gospel recording artist and the State Minister of Music
for the
State of New Jersey Churches of God in Christ, this was REALLY a major
adjustment for me.
I painfully learned that my friends were my
friends as long as we were
in agreement "when it comes to Jesus." I have been told
many times, "The
bible says, how can two walk together except they agree." I couldn't
understand why other ministers (who I thought were my friends) discontinued
our relationship as friends just because I learned something that
they didn't know or agreed with??? What did that have to do with me
as a person???
In closing, please understand, what
God reveals to you, is for YOU! I
made the mistake of trying to take others along with me to the next
level in
MY development. It doesn't work that way! Realize that if you choose
to
learn more, you may very well lose some of your closest friends. You
will
want to take them to the next level with you, but realize that God
is taking
YOU there...not y'all there.
I pray that this testimony is helpful
to some brother or sister who is
making their transition to Afrikan consciousness. Stay strong, Brothers
and Sisters, and always know that the Creator and the Ancestors are
with you!
Hotep,
Brother Ray
(a.k.a. "Sa Ra")
Ray Hagins verdict
